Well, the list is short, very short, my single friends. There is one thing you should get this Valentine’s Day: a crush. If you don’t already have one, that is.

Having a crush is practically brain food — think salmon or walnuts, but with a side of daydreams. Having a crush is good for you. You should get one. When you’re dealing with a full-on course load and a bunch of extracurriculars, it’ll give you one other fun thing to exercise your brain. Trust me, it’s going to be great.

The answer to some questions is a pretty easy “no.” Take, “is it ever acceptable to wear socks with sandals” and “should I try to parallel park in front of a crowd of onlookers?” These are both clearly “no’s.” And we can add one more question to the list: “Can you ever be too old to have a crush?” Glad we got that out of the way.

Imagine this: you, on the brink of academic meltdown, are surrounded by textbooks and buried in one of the big sofas in Bass. Enter your crush — the unsung hero, the distraction you never knew you needed. Suddenly, you’re calculating the probability of “accidentally” bumping into them at the library instead of the probability of finding a particle at a given position. The pressure of deadlines will get you back on track in a few minutes. For now, just enjoy the little giggly self you are with butterflies in your stomach.

Now, some may argue that crushes should be left in the hallowed halls of high school. But I say, crushes are the anti-aging fix — and way cheaper than Botox. I know, it’s not always rosy and pink and there is quite a bit of chance that they don’t like you back. But that’s what makes it so fun! It’s the “could” not the “will” that makes having a crush intoxicating.

Your crush could ask you on a study date. The chances of this actually happening — low, pretty low. But they could. See where I’m going with this? Nowhere, absolutely nowhere, that’s the point. It’s just a daydream you’ll keep playing on your mind with different twists every week until you make it to your classroom at the top of science hill and then the professor starts talking about electrons and their spins and puff! No daydream in the one-mile radius. It’s a time-efficient, cost-effective boredom buster. I’m telling you, if you don’t have one, get one!

So, whether you’re staring at a set of equations in your textbook or battling your keyboard in the library, let your crush be the sprinkle of joy to your day. Embrace the whimsy because, let’s face it, adulting is overrated, and crushes are the perfect rebellion against the mundane. Who wants to deal with existential angst and taxes when you can, instead, daydream about your crush. 

Getting a relationship, everyone can do that. Okay, maybe not everyone. Fine, fine! It’s not that easy. But that’s not the point. Focus! We’re talking about why it’s great to have a crush.

One day you’ll be bored out of your mind, waiting for the empty Word File on your laptop to magically turn itself into a complete essay when suddenly the most nonsensical or non-romantic text you’ve ever seen will pop on your phone, and you’ll smile, and that’s when you’ll know you did it! You have a crush. The text might say “have you started the p-set?” or “I saw a pigeon” or “do you want to go do *insert friendly activity here.*” It doesn’t matter what the text says, that they saw a pigeon or that they want to hang out in what’s probably a not-a-date setting. What makes you a wonderfully successful crush-haver is that seeing their name pop up on your phone puts a stupid smile on your face.

The key is though, don’t get carried away. It’s just a crush. It’s brain food. It’s mental exercise. It helps you strategize, better than chess some might say — it’s me, I say it. And who knows, you might even show up to your 9 a.m. earlier than 9:10 next week, just to sit next to them when they have no idea. One of my friends has a Commons crush: it’s the cute guy that walks by the dish drop whenever she’s there. She doesn’t even know his name but, once again, it doesn’t matter. Because it’s a crush! Well, she has mastered the art, now it’s your turn.

If you already have a crush, this Valentine’s Day, ask them out, make the “could” a “will.” They might like you back after all. And if they don’t, who cares, you can get a new one at Commons, in one of your sections — please, not the section asshole — the dining hall… practically anywhere. Happy Valentine’s Day to those who celebrate and for the last time, get a crush if you don’t have one already, I’m serious.