“Your total comes to $24.99.”

The number on the Urban Outfitters register mocks me with its pixelated glare. 

“Are you really going to spend $25 on this scrap of fabric that you’ll wear to one birthday party and never again?” they taunt. I open my wallet and grab two tens and a five. 

Yes. 

Yes I am.

Because when I walk out of the store, the amount of money in my bank account is the same as it was when I walked in. If you buy something with cash, it doesn’t count. That’s the beauty of girl math.

Coined somewhere on TikTok earlier this year (I think … I’m an Instagram Reels girl, don’t ask me), “girl math” is the term for how girls rationalize spending money. Being broke, especially in college, is not easy. I can’t begin to count the number of times last year that I felt like I had to say “no” to things because I didn’t have enough money or was worried about saving up. In a way, girl math is just an excuse for self-love. Really want that shirt? Treat yourself! Got an A on that midterm? You deserve that coffee! Had a rough day? You still deserve that coffee! Life is hard, and girl math makes it a little easier. We all stand to gain something from girl math. 

Unlike real math, girl math doesn’t have a distinct set of formulas or rules that it must follow. But if you need a girl math tutor, never fear — there are but a few things you need to know.

Anything under $5 is free. Anything over $5 can still be justifiable to buy, depending on what it is. Spending $5 on coffee, for instance, is way harder than spending $5 on something that’s traditionally more expensive but for some reason über-cheap, like books or jeans (yes, $5 jeans do exist. I found some on super-sale at Urban two summers ago, and it was life changing). 

Sales have their own rules. For example, if something is on sale for $25, then it’s automatically less expensive than something that’s $25 but not on sale. As such, you should take advantage of the deal and buy it. And if you need to spend a little extra money to get the deal, whether that’s free shipping or  buy-two-get-one-free, then nine times out of ten, you’re perfectly justified. 

But don’t be fooled — girl math isn’t all about spending. You can save money with girl 

math, too. Say you find a book you’ve been dying to read at Atticus for $20. If you practice self-restraint and don’t buy it, then you can spend up to $20 guilt-free on other things… like one iced vanilla chai from Book Trader Café, one Branford College tote bag and one small cup of cookie batter ice cream from Ashley’s (just a suggestion, but the flavor really is excellent). 

And of course, the biggest rule of girl math, at least in my opinion, is that cash doesn’t count. Ever.

But Hannah, you might be wondering. If girl math exists, is there such a thing as boy math?

What is boy math? Who created it? Does it even exist? The only boy math I’ve ever encountered is when guys under 6’0” add three inches to their height when people ask how tall they are (justice for short kings!). 

I can’t emphasize enough: girl math is not just for girls. Girl math is for everyone who needs an excuse for self-love. And by that definition, we could all use a little more girl math in our lives.