Pulling Back the Curtain

Out of my bondage, sorrow and night

I have played enough, pull me out of the fight

I feel no joy, my eyes have no delight

In this miserable game you have made my life

Quiet I have kept the sorrow of my days

The dullness separated from the sun’s rays

Withering in the shadows of your construction

Out of my shameful failure and loss

I wanted to know, I paid the cost

I have seen and felt, but now I am lost

For my blood, sweat and tears I am rewarded with exhaust

Out of unrest and arrogant pride

Free from your shackles, I will rise

You have done your worst, now step aside

Where you tried to kill my spirit, my limits died

Great problems you made, solutions you hoard

I paid the price of silence too long, I cannot afford

My voice will be heard, your hearts I implore

Not through charm or whisper, but jarring chord

Tugging on your heart strings, do my cries entertain?

If I pluck too hard, would it be in vain?

All my life I have known the rain,

Hear my song and be consumed by its pain.

Artist Statement

This painting was originally inspired by a research paper I wrote titled “Science, Race and Yale: The Perpetuation of Slavery through the Intellectual Fortification of Racial Capitalism,” which explores the history of Yale University’s support and upholding of slavery. In my paper, I found that many of the pervasive ideas and stereotypes regarding race were validated and disseminated from the men who founded this university. “Pulling Back the Curtain” alludes to the moment in The Wizard of Oz where Dorothy finally reaches the wizard and sees him for who he really is. The mystery is unraveled, the illusion is shattered, and the truth is seen clearly. 

I originally intended for the scene in the poem and painting to illustrate a person walking into the Yale Corporation room to reveal what goes on behind the scenes at this institution. But I have since shifted my focus. Rather than wasting my creativity on dead men, who have made it clear that I, as a person of color, would only make the pages of their stories as an inferior subject, I have decided to paint a scene of Love. A scene of expression. A scene of community. A scene of life. 

After hosting The Speak E-Z, a revival of the Afro-American Cultural Center’s open mic scene, I was inspired to pull back a different curtain and reveal the scene that we occupy in spite of those who would rather see us dead and dying, in spite of those who seek to silence us and reduce us to diversity numbers and in spite of the University that is actively trying to dismantle our peace. We will speak, and we will be heard. 

Pulling Back the Curtain is a painting of a scene where someone opens the door to Otherwise, an alternative reality of the universe where the person in the painting no longer has to fixate on the pain that they initially pulled back the curtain to. It is an invitation to escape. The painting represents the feeling of disbelief in finding something that you were looking for but believed to be gone. It tries to capture the moment when you finally see something worth seeing. 

While painting, I tried to channel my own pain from the heart-wrenching history I learned while researching Yale and its perpetuation of slavery. I was saved from much of this pain by moments with my classmates, sharing our visions of Otherwise and discussing how to hold Yale accountable for its actions to make up for the wrongs it has built itself on.