In order to evaluate Asher Roth’s “I Love College,” one must first break away from the suburban symphony that backs the rapper’s fairly straightforward lyrics. Now, with regards to inventiveness of verse and correlation between Asher Roth’s “College” and “Yale,” we can begin to assess what kind of value this jam holds for folks like us.

When was the last time you said, “That party last night was awfully crazy, I wish we taped it?” Let’s be honest, what about watching a video of sweaty people grinding, drinking and stumbling is appealing? Wouldn’t you rather watch “White Girls”? Asher’s crazy night involves dancing in some hypnotic fashion that causes a girl to remove all of her hot going-out clothes. Honestly, when I “dance my ass off” what usually results is a force field of body odor capable of deterring any potential for my pink torpedo to sink a naked beauty.

Good thing Asher is the “Cham-Pee-On at Beer PAWNG, Allen Iver-SAWN, Hakeem Ola-JEW-WAWN” because “otherwise [he] naked,” and I can almost guarantee that his pale and fleshy birthday suit is even less hood than his flow. Please find something more interesting to talk about than pizza, weed and beer … perhaps semi-consensual sex?