Anastasia Ibrahim
Contributing Reporter
Author Archive
What I Was Doing When I Opened My Yale Acceptance Letter?

Anastasia Ibrahim: Two days before my acceptance letter came out, my mom knocked lightly on my door and kneeled at my bedside with the most […]

If I Told the Truth in My College Essay, Here’s What It Would’ve Said

The college essay that got me admitted to Yale was about a parking lot. I thought I was a fucking genius. I was participating in […]

What’s Under the Mask? Navigating What Constitutes an Appropriate Response To Mask Removal

If you’re reading this piece, you’re probably ugly, just like me, and that’s why you’re worried about taking off your mask. Have no fear. Today, […]

Majors At Yale That Shouldn’t Exist + The Two That Should

Should Not: Economics The official major for what we like to call “Econ” requires courses in Econometrics and Quantitative Economics, and I can assure you […]

A Motion to Serve Fortune Cookies in the Dining Hall. And Also Here’s What They Should Say.

Yale is a fucking multi-cultural melting pot. But have you ever been to the dining hall? Of course you have — you’ve been forced onto […]

URGENT: Your Missed Covid Test

Dear Nameless Yale Student We Only Know You by Your MyChart NetID Login,  It seems as of early this morning, like around 4:37am, you haven’t […]

Picking A Personality

Last week I was in the shower, and I was thinking about what my personality should be. I was like, “Oh shit — I’m back […]

Sophie Henry
I Think My Roommate Hates Me and Everything I Do

I’m convinced my roommate wants me to stop showering. And stop eating and drinking. I’m also convinced she wants to cut off the water supply […]

Roxanna Andrade
How to Get Over Losing a Man in 10 Days: Learn to Pick Em’ Well

Few people know the key to getting over losing a man has absolutely nothing to do with you — and everything to do with the […]

NC Doesn’t Run on Dunkin’, but I Do

If there’s one thing New England is known for other than Tom Brady — and subsequently the Patriots — or the iconic color change of […]

Yale’s Timmy T Takes

It’s Timothée Chalamet’s World — And I Wish I Wasn’t Living In It By Audrey Kolker   Maybe it’s all two minutes and 33 seconds […]