Annie Lin

This isn’t the advice you’ll find in your welcome packet. It’s not about how to register for classes or where to find the best study spots. This is the emotional truth — the kind of advice you won’t find on a map, but that matters the most.

1. Let Go of Expectations

I remember sitting in the Branford Dining Hall the first night at Yale. Dean G stood before us and said something unexpected:  “If you need to take some time off from Yale, here’s how to do it.” 

It felt almost out of place — after all, we had just arrived. But then she added, “Yale is no longer a dream. It’s your reality now. You’ll make this experience your own, and it might not look like what you imagined.” That was the point.

People come to Yale for all kinds of reasons. Some grew up idolizing it. Others applied early and never looked back. Some still aren’t sure if they want to be here. During those first few days — especially around Bulldog Days — there’s this quiet pressure for everything to feel magical. But maybe you won’t love the experience of sleeping on the uncomfortable sofa of a stranger’s suite, you’ll perhaps think that New Haven feels too small, or go to that club that seemed so promising on the website… and leave halfway through. Maybe you’ll be overwhelmed by the packed schedule, get lost on your way to a master class, or show up to something expecting free pizza or ice cream and find a weird tray of sandwiches instead. 

Yale can feel magical. Having my Dean emphasize students’ mental health from day one was magical in and of itself. And Yale is like that in many ways. The professors are brilliant. Events are huge. The people are impressive and passionate. You’ll experience very special moments. I still remember my first snow, the first time I saw my name printed out in the News, the first paper I submitted, discovering my favorite spots on campus, and the first debriefs over Atticus coffee. 

But it won’t feel perfect all the time, because this isn’t magical. This is life, which is unpredictable and imperfect. So the first and most important advice? Let go of the fantasy. Release the pressure. Let the experience be what it is — not what you think it has to be.

Growth doesn’t come from chasing perfection. It comes from sitting with discomfort and learning through challenges. That’s how you become more grounded and more fully yourself.

2. Embrace Differences

Yale is filled with people who think, speak, act and look different from you — and that’s good. Be curious, not judgmental. Talk to people who aren’t “like you.” Ask questions. Listen more than you speak. Say hi. Learn names. Be a warm presence. 

You came here to grow, so step outside your comfort zone. And treat everyone with respect, not just your peers — security guards, dining hall workers, custodial staff. Kindness matters. A simple hello when walking around campus can turn a stranger into a familiar face, and those moments of connection make campus feel like home for them and also for you.

3. Cut Your Pizza However You Want

New Haven is known for its pizza — but this is also a metaphor.

Imagine your life as a pizza. Each slice represents something: academics, social life, extracurriculars, rest, creativity, exercise. You get to decide how big each slice is.

Be intentional. Don’t let one area — academics, extracurriculars or your social life — consume the whole pie. It’s not just about hours spent studying, but about how much mental space you dedicate to it and the pressure you put on yourself. 

When academic anxiety kicks in, I feel the urge to turn down plans, skip meals, and live in Bass — only to end up too tired to do my best work. Finding balance is hard. But what’s helped is trying to engage meaningfully with my work — focus on curiosity over perfection, the work feels less like a burden and more like something I’m part of. 

You’re holding the pizza cutter. You choose the balance. Prioritize well-being, not just performance or appearances. Also, remember that Yale itself is just a slice and you’re a whole pizza. 

4. Roommates and Suitemates: It’s Okay

When housing assignments come out, hearts race and the “what ifs” start spiraling. What if they’re super messy? What if they’re antisocial — or way too social? What if their decor clashes with yours, or they stay up until 5 a.m. and sleep through half the day? It’s easy to let your imagination run wild.

But here’s the truth: it doesn’t matter that much. Some people instantly click with their first-year suitemates and become lifelong friends. Others don’t — and that’s perfectly okay. Some share a great living dynamic without being exceptionally close. Others simply coexist.

Whatever your situation, remember: it’s temporary. Everyone’s adjusting. If your suite turns out to be excellent, enjoy it. If it’s not, it won’t define your year. At worst, you’ll leave with a few stories and more emotional flexibility. It’s all part of the experience. 

5. Friendship Takes Time 

College friendships are often brand new. Don’t compare them to the relationships you’ve had for years back home. These people are meeting you in a new phase of life — and that’s great in its own way.

Don’t rush it. Some friends are for late-night talks, others for classwork, others for weekend fun. All are valuable. Let connections form naturally. Be yourself, stay open, and trust your timing.

6. Chase Curiosity and Creativity

 If someone on campus intrigues you — a professor, a classmate or a staff member — reach out. Ask questions. Be genuinely interested. Yale is full of people who are passionate about what they do, and most are eager to share it. Go to talks. Sit in on lectures. Show up to office hours, even just to listen. Email professors you admire, even if you’re not in their class. I reached out to a professor whose book I had read before coming to Yale — we exchanged emails, and eventually got lunch. That conversation stayed with me. You never know which moment might shift your thinking, spark a new interest, or open an unexpected door.

And when it comes to your work: own it. Don’t compare your essays, ideas or class participation to what others are doing. This place isn’t about perfection; it’s about growth. Don’t outsource your voice (particularly to AI tools!) — trust it. Let your work reflect your questions, your thoughts and your perspective. It may not be flawless, but authenticity always stands out. You’re not expected to know everything already. You’re here to learn and become more fully yourself.

7. Don’t Trust Instagram 

Even “casual” Instagram posts are curated. Don’t fall into the comparison trap — with people back home, in other schools, or right next to you. Focus on your own life.

8. Homesickness is Temporary 

Sometimes, it hits early, and sometimes, it doesn’t show up until after a break, when you return and everything suddenly feels unfamiliar again. You’ll miss your bed, your dog, your family and your friends. That’s normal.

I remember returning after Thanksgiving break — finals were approaching, the days were shorter, and the cold had settled in. Everything felt a little heavier, but that feeling passed. Slowly, I settled back in. I got through finals. I made space for little joys, and I wasn’t alone.

Call home. Go for a walk. Listen to music. Talk to someone. Go to the gym. Don’t force yourself into plans if rest is what you need. You’re allowed to take care of yourself.

Yale moves fast. Take it in. Soak up the moments & say yes.

But don’t lose yourself in it. Remember your values. Stay grounded. Keep what matters close. Yale will challenge you, stretch you and shape you — but don’t let it erase you. Make it expand you.