Giovanna Truong

One day, while scrolling through Instagram Reels, I saw a video that claimed that Yale was the No. 2 university in the country to meet your spouse — only after BYU. Obviously, Instagram Reels is not the most reliable of sources, but I do feel like there is a common sentiment that many Yalies or Ivy Leaguers marry each other. It seems to make sense — I’m sure there are many double legacies at Yale. There are even Yale professors married to each other, such as husband and wife duo Ellen Handler Spitz and Howard Bloch who teach “Love, Marriage, Family: A Psychological Study Through the Arts” together. However, given the fact that only two of my friends are in lasting Yale relationships, I also feel a bit skeptical about this statistic.

So, I decided to ask Yalies: Does the Yusband, Yife, or Yignificant Yother exist and where am I, or any of you lovely readers for that matter, to find one?

I figured the most successful stories would come from upperclassmen who have had more time to find a partner here. To my surprise, asking upperclassmen for their takes was not exactly fruitful. One Davenport senior confidently proclaimed, “Yo, my Yife is NOT here,” with a knowing shake of his head. A Morse sophomore echoed the sentiment with one of my personal favorite interview quotes: “This campus is a wasteland.” So much for plenty of fish in the sea!

So, if upperclassmen aren’t having any luck with each other, maybe there are certain spaces on campus where love is in the air? I asked one Yale Glee Club member to find out. As a reminder, the Glee Club is fairly exclusive in membership, tours together frequently and presumably all members share at least one common interest. They also have their own language of sorts — they have the tradition of putting “Gl-” in front of words. Sounds like the perfect recipe for a lasting relationship, right? Well, apparently that theory falls flat. One Glee member gave me the following quote: “Glincest is frowned upon.” I guess the high pressure environment of having to go on multiple all-expenses-paid-by-Yale international vacations, I mean tours, leaves members with little emotional bandwidth for relationships with each other.

After these interactions, I wondered if all hope for the Yusband was lost. However, I did stumble upon one example of a successful Yusband/Yife duo through a Branfordian friend. The Yife in question is her older sister, but she did somewhat sheepishly admit that, “they had already found each other by this time in the school year.” Not exactly looking great for the fantasy/delusion that you still have time to meet someone before graduation! 

The only other success story that I found was from an APhi sister, who told me that she frequently talks to alumni and that most of them say that they meet their spouse after graduation at alumni events. This is almost more upsetting to me. You mean that what might find us Yalies lasting love is not our (somewhat embarrassing) attempts to find each other now but our LinkedIn connections five years down the line? Tragic.

It seemed that almost everyone I talked to shared a pessimistic sentiment about the question of whether the Yusband exists. Whether it was a confident “nope” from a Piersonknight — yes, that’s what they officially call people from Pierson — to just straight laughter from a Trumbull first year, no one feels confident in Yale’s ability to match them to a potential spouse. 

Some people even have horror stories. For many, last month’s marriage pact releases felt more like a cruel joke than an actual attempt at finding love. One Saybrugian matched with a best friend’s opp, dooming the relationship from the start. (Also, side note, this school is too small. Anyone else think this school is too small?) Another friend matched with an upperclassman who was already pretty notorious for having an affinity for freshmen… need I go on? And last and certainly least, one Grace Hopper freshman had to deal with the ego crush of getting not even a marriage pact, but a friend match. Ouch.

After all of this ‘research,’ what have I learned? Perhaps the Yignificant Yother only exists as an illusion in our minds — and on Instagram reels. Let’s just say it’s not looking great out there. Regardless of the outcome, we can all agree that being delusional with our friends is always entertaining, so the myth isn’t likely to go anywhere anytime soon!