Abby Zheng

SHHHHHH!!! Be very, very, very quiet. I can explain.

Who am I to shush you? By cheese, I’ve forgotten my manners, haven’t I?!? My name is Stilton. Geronimo Stilton!

Yes, that Geronimo, one and the same, editor of the Rodent’s Gazette — the most famouse newspaper in New Mouse City.

So you might be wondering, “How did I end up here, on the floor of Branford F22?” It’s a looooonnnngggg story. And it all started on a morning just like any other morning…


I was walking with my sister Thea and our nephew Benjamin. Benjamin had the day off from school and wanted to mouse around with his favorite uncle. But he had taken so long to tie his tie that I was now running late. And I couldn’t be late because it was a veeerrryyy important day. My special investigator, Hercule Poirat, was coming in to tell me about his top secret investigation. 

Suddenly, I got a call from my friend, Professor Paws von Volt. Normally, on a day like that, I wouldn’t have picked up. But I had to find out what he was up to.

He was screaming right away: “Geronimooooo, you need to come immediately! I’ve built something that will change the world! You need to see it yourself!!!”

“I can’t just pawse all my other work, Professor. It will have to wait,” I told him.

“Geronimo, this is an enormouse breakthrough,” he explained breathlessly.

Benjamin’s ears perked up as he could sniff an adventure coming.

“Is it the anti-cheese-trap invention?” I asked.

“It’s bigger,” he said.

“Holey swiss! That’s impossible,” I told him. “Nothing could be bigger than that.”

“I guess you’ll have to see,” he said, and then he hung up.

I couldn’t imagine what could be more important than the anti-cheese-trap invention. Maybe he was lying, but I needed to sniff around the story.

“Benny, Thea, you guys talk to Detective Poirat. I need to run,” I told them.

“Shut your trap. We’d never miss a gouda opportunity for an adventure,” Thea said.

I wanted to argue but there was no time. So we all set off to meet Professor von Volt.

“Stilton, I’ll keep it brie-f,” he exclaimed when we arrived at his secret lab.

“We can travel across the multiverse.”

“The what?!?!” I asked. I had never in the mouse-god’s name heard of the multipliers. 

“There’s no time to explain. Get in the portal!” he commanded.

I didn’t want to, but Benjamin and Thea grabbed my arms and dragged me in.

We whirled and twirled and swirled, like mozzarella being kneaded into a ball. When I woke up, I was in a mysterious room. On the wall it said “Saybrook J41.” 

“Where are we? How did we get here?” Benjamin whispered, whiskers trembling.

“I don’t know, but I’ve got a feeling we’re not in New Mouse City anymore, Benji.”

Before we could say anything else, a giant human appeared and started shrieking.


The muensters swung their clubs at us in attempted murder, but we hid in the walls. I cursed Professor Paws for getting us into this mess. I just wanted to go back home, but the danger only made Benjamin more excited. “It’s a real-life adventure, Uncle.”

As we hid beneath the couch, Benjamin’s whiskers started perking up. I could smell it too. There was cheese in the breeze.

When the humans left, our whiskers guided us to the fridge. Cheddar my jack! There was so much cheese in there! We feasted. When we were satisfied, we explored the walls of places called “Branford” and “Jonathan Edwards.” Hallelujah!!! There were dozens and dozens of rooms, all brimming with beautiful, mouseterfully curated cheeses. We never wanted to leave. 

We crawled and we ate and we crawled and we ate, and we rarely got caught. We cuddled with the humans while they slept to show our gratitude, but this only seemed to scare them.

All of which brings us to our present situation. You’ve found us, but I know you have kindness inside. Please, I implore you! Let us live and let us love our cheese! One day soon, I’ll go back to write my tell-all of the mousetiverse. But, not to be cheesy, today’s not that day. I’m staying in Branford.

Andrew Cramer is a former sports editor, women's basketball beat reporter, and WKND personal columnist at the YDN. He still writes for the WKND and Sports sections. He is a junior in Jonathan Edwards College and is majoring in Ethics, Politics & Economics.