Dear Yale,

Do you have carpal tunnel from swiping left so many times?

Do you find yourself flirting with the waitresses at Mamoun’s because, hey, what have you got to lose?

Are you taking Sexy Psych as a self-help class?


Are you lonely, Yale?


If so, fear not. Well, fear a little bit. But definitely fear less than had previously been the case, because WKND is here to help, with our annual Valentine’s Day competition:




Over the next month, WKND will be setting up blind dates for love-lorn (or just on-the-market) Yalies. If you want to be considered, just submit the following to,, or :

  •  your name
  •  your major (and imaginary minor),
  •  your (real or hypothetical) superpower,
  •  the title of your future autobiography, and
  •  a description of your ideal mate. Please specify your gender and your gender preference.

WKND will select a handful of these bachelors and bachelorettes; then, we’ll publish their answers to the questions above in this Friday’s issue! Finally, readers will vote for their favorite candidates. The winners will go on blind dates on WKND’s dime.

Don’t worry — we won’t publish your name, so feel free to be honest and make awkward confessions! That is, unless you win, in which case you’ll write up a summary of your date to appear in a future edition of WKND. Long live journalism! So get those submissions in. Because love can’t wait.