The term “SWUG,” suffocatingly popular, has swept our campus, and now, the entire nation like a pandemic. Its exploding popularity has thrown the rest of us out of the spotlight and under the bus, and we feel a profound injustice. Here’s a list of key Yale terms that will hopefully help bring us, too, from anonymity to acronym.

SWOO: Senior Without Options. The senior slowly realizing her/she has no career or romantic options after graduation.

BOYS: Burnt Out Yale Student. Took six credits one too many times (once) and needs a full year off to recover.

BaCK: Bass Cafe Kid.  Do you even do any work, or do you just sit in the brown chairs and wait for friends to show up?

LiSH: Liberated Senior Honey. Often confused with a SWUG, a LiSH is a fly girl or boy who has realized college is too short to do anything (or anyone) other than what he or she wants .

SWOS: Student Without Standards. It’s hipster. Don’t worry about it.

FatBro: The frat guy who drank so much he’s no longer robustly athletic, he’s just fat.

DKE-Scusting: The ninth circle of male unattractiveness. Probably wearing a T-shirt with the sleeves cut off.

Life of PiPhi: The sorority girl who muploads her every waking moment.

SHAP: Should Have Attended Princeton. Where are all the husbands and eating clubs?

BoCAG: Banking or Consulting After Graduation. Interests include: designer suits, spreadsheets and gold stickers.

SWAH: Sophomore Who’s Always High. Hunh?

CATSIP: Considers Acceptable To Sing In Public? Oh, you have jam next week? Why pay $5 for milk when I got the cow for free all semester?

JOWJ: Junior, Only Wants a Job. Will evolve into a BoCAG.

SAPS: Student Always Protesting Something. Cross Campus = second home, portable whiteboards = critical possession, believes = all other Yalies are heartless jerks.

SWONF: Senior With Oddly No Friends. What have you been doing for the past three years? Realizes he has been befriending extracurriculars and not people.

SSLaR: Secretly Sexy Lab Rat. That super hot person you’ve only seen in Sterling Chem Lab.

UGH: Unreachable Gay Hottie. Doesn’t play for your team, and thus the main source of your angst.

SIDH: Sneaks Into Dining Hall. Time to get on the meal plan.

DOB: Drinks Only in Bass. Nothing like a few shots to get pumped for a problem set.

DJAL: Dat Junior Ass-Licker. We didn’t know there was a varisty social climbing team.

PW: Percy Weasleys. Takes IMs/College Council/tour guiding too seriously.

NoGAS: Nobody Gives a Shit. Enough said.