Did you ever wonder what the Prince of Persia video game would be like if it was a LIVE ACTION CINEMA EVENT? Wonder no more! Disney and Jerry Bruckheimer have teamed up once again to lower the bar for what is considered acceptable entertainment, and they’re dragging an all star cast down with them. Oscar-nominated actor Jake Gyllenhaal plays the title role, and that’s not even the half of it. Sir Ben Kingsley, the man who won an Oscar for playing Gandhi, is playing the bad guy.

And, of course, everyone in the movie has a British accent because everyone knows that everyone in the Persian Empire was secretly from England.

The “film” hits theaters May 28, so I have plenty of time to eat the copious amount of paint chips it will take for me to actually enjoy it.

I shudder to think how many orphans could have been fed using the money they spent on the special effects.