People of Yale! I bear a message from the After-World pertaining to this Run-Off for Treasure-Hoarder so that you might carry out the wishes of these unknown hands in electing Adam Thomas to be your Treasure-Guardian.
I slept fitfully last night, consumed by a strange vision. My dream transported me to the far-off Graznoria, where our forefathers’ and foremothers’ spirits roam. I passed through a portal and emerged in a tomb that surpassed even Commons in its monumentality, and my footfalls echoed across its smooth marble floors. Letters carved by an ancient hand read: ADAM THOMAS IS THE FUTURE.
The higher powers have spoken to me. I, Colin Adamo, loyal Knight of Yale, hereby endorse Adam Thomas ’12 for YCC treasurer.
The writer is a junior in Pierson College and a candidate for Yale College Council treasurer.