Developing yet another innovative feature to serve the Yale community, the Yale Daily News is proud to introduce scenic Personals, an occasional feature profiling a selection of eligible singles living in a residential college or cozy off-campus abode near you.

Easha: SAF. Looking for escort home from 202 York. Must be willing to wait patiently until sunrise. Likes: cheesecake brownies, catcalls from construction workers, bathos, heroes and skinny jeans on fat people. Dislikes: mixed metaphors and people who have their shit together.

Summer: S?F. Looking for an e-Harmony gift card. Prefers sum over $50, but the size of the package is not as important as the quality. Likes: sarcasm, contortionists, extremes, stand-up comedy and jazz at 2 in the morning. Dislikes: course packets, pretensions, high voices, people who like quiet and your mom.

Donnell: SWF. Looking for “It’s Complicated” facebook relationship(s) with trained masseuses who fear serious commitment. Likes: soft pretzels, water ice, guilty pleasures, hybrid cars and long walks (over empty beer cans) on the N.J. beaches. Dislikes: beer, tardiness and losing things.

We, the three single, attractive, newly-crowned resident divas of the scene room would like to add a thank you to our predecessors, especially Claire, David, Kevin, Max, Steph and Susan. We’d date you all if we could … really, we would. You’ve given us more than just stains on our keyboards; you’ve left us your furniture, too. But seriously, we hope to do you and your drinking habits proud.

Now we lift our Chips Ahoy and champagne high and toast to another excellent year of scene!

– easha, summer and donnell