With a little help from Craig David, this guide highlights the hot spots on and around campus — from the dingy basements of fraternities to the chic new nightclubs on Crown Street.

Met this girl on Monday —

What better way to start the week than with half-priced margaritas at C.O. Jones? A short cab ride (or free Yale Transit Bus) takes you to the cozy, newly popular restaurant and bar on State Street. This is a sit-down venue, so go with friends.

Took her for a drink on Tuesday —

Tuesday Night Club (TNC) in Pierson College’s Lower Court is a good chance to grab a beer and enjoy some conversation as the weekly grind kicks into gear.

While the attendance at these gatherings is much larger toward the beginning and end of the school year (when the weather is warmer) some hard-core Piersonites and their friends brave the cold year-round.

We were making love by Wednesday —

No, we weren’t. Sorry guys, that’s just the song. We were doing no such thing. This is about night life.

For many Yalies, the weekend begins on Wednesday night. With the revival of “Yale nights” at both Risk Night Club and Toad’s Place, many Yalies have reclaimed Wednesday for partying. Both feature open bars and free admissions with a valid Yale ID (that says you are 21).

Risk, located on Crown Street, boasts two dance floors, a state-of-the-art sound system, and live spinning of hip-hop music, along with comfy couches, semi-secluded sitting areas, and dance platforms.

Toad’s Place, located on York Street, was recently named Playboy’s No. 1 College Bar of the Month. Toad’s is Yale’s famous nightclub, bar and concert hall, hosting a wide array of musical acts and sponsoring Yale dance parties on Wednesday and Saturday nights. An expansive dance floor, complete with a stage and a “booty cam” projecting onto large screens, make Toad’s Place the quintessential nightlife destination.

After a long night of partying, some stop by late-night at Sigma Nu on High Street, while others grab a slice at Yorkside Pizza and call it a night.

And on Thursday and Friday and Saturday —

Unless you’re a Directed Suicide drudge, chances are you will be happy to let loose on Thursday night.

On Thursday nights past, freshmen would congregate at Naples and order pizza and a pitcher. Sadly, Naples (or at least its liquor license) is no more. Pubs and clubs near campus are doing their best to fill the void.

One of them is T.J. Tucker’s, a hotel bar on Chapel Street, which boasts big booths, cheap pitchers and a friendly atmosphere. Another is the wood-paneled Playwright on Temple Street, a newly opened Irish-style pub with live music.

For the “clubbier” partier, BAR and Alchemy are ideal — at least early in the evening, when BAR has dollar beers and Alchemy has an open bar.

Alchemy has three main sections, including the front room, with black lights and trendy sofas; the warehouse-like dance floor with live spun hip-hop and top 40; and the upstairs area with pool tables and a deejay spinning techno.

A few doors down is BAR. Ever-trendy BAR features a mod ambiance and pool tables — or so I’m told, since the bouncer has never once believed I am a 24-year-old from Montana.

For those who aren’t into clubbing, Miya’s, Viva Zapata and El Amigo Felix are prime spots for Thursday night.

Miya’s, on Howe Street, is a favored site for sake-bombing, while Viva Zapata on Park Street and El Amigo Felix on Whalley Avenue serve great margaritas and sangria.

Fridays tend to bring out the deep-seated Yale propensity to party-hop.

Many residential colleges and campus organizations host happy hours on Friday evenings to jump-start the weekend. After pre-gaming, Yalies usually venture to a few of the many parties happening on any given Friday night in suites, at frats, in college courtyards and at cultural houses.

Beta Theta Pi, located on Lynwood Place, hosts late-nights, offering Yalies the opportunity to hone their beer-pong skills.

Saturday festivities continue around campus, but for many, all roads lead to Toad’s for its weekly “Saturday Night Dance Party.” The party begins in the lines outside, which provide ample time to compare notes and form a game plan.

We chilled on Sunday

Just because Craig David does doesn’t mean you have to.

T.J. Tucker’s hosts karaoke Sunday and Wednesday nights, allowing singers and the tone-deaf alike to live the dream of pop stardom.

One final note: if you are nervous about peer pressure and partying in college, don’t be. You will have lots of fun here whether or not you drink. You can go out and have a wonderful time without ever having a sip — I have.