WKND COMMENT: Suggestions for Yale Facebook pages

Karin wants to see a different kind of Yalie engagement on here.
Karin wants to see a different kind of Yalie engagement on here. // Creative Commons

Recently, I’ve noticed an absolute deluge of Yale-related Facebook pages cropping up all over my newsfeed, mentioning my friends or suggesting I ‘like’ them. Some, like Yale Insults and Yale Back-Handed Compliments, are entertaining in a schadenfreude-y, “make you feel like a terrible person for laughing” way. Yale Compliments and Yale PostSecret are nauseatingly sweet and soberingly real, respectively, and at least two other pages exist for the express purpose of continuing a proud tradition of indirect sexual advances — hey there, Yale Crush and Yale Hookups!

Ostensibly because I care about furthering Yale’s culture, but realistically because I’m jealous that I have yet to be relevant enough to be featured on any of these pages, I feel compelled to suggest a few more Yale Facebook pages. And, hey, if any of you feel strongly about them either way, mind mentioning it to Insults or Compliments? I like getting notifications.

Yale Mildly Impressed

Because sometimes people do things that are neat, but not neat enough to warrant a gushing commendation on Yale Compliments. Some examples might include watching an entire episode of The Walking Dead without cringing or getting more than three substantial food items with a Durfee’s lunch swipe.

Yale Section Asshole

If you’ve ever fantasized about shutting down a section asshole with a devastatingly poignant rant (and if you haven’t, you might be the asshole) but never mustered the courage to actually do so, this page is for you! Post the diatribe you have perfectly scripted in your head, or submit just their name so they’re at least aware and can begin the road to recovery or greater, reactive asshole-ness.

Yale James Franco Sightings

Because never again do I want to waste an entire afternoon racing pointless laps between HGS, SSS, and the YUAG in the rain with nothing to guide me but sporadic updates from friends of friends.

Yale Petty Complaints

We all have that one friend who responds to any complaint by launching into a diatribe about how we need to get some perspective because some people have to constantly dodge drug lords/rapists/guerilla militia generals on their 52-mile hike to fetch water and hopefully some ibuprofen to keep the malaria headaches at bay. No more! This page will allow you to anonymously vent to the internet about how there weren’t enough chicken tenders or how the ID swipe into Silliman is way too far from the gate itself.

Someone with too much time on their hands get on these — we could all use more procrastinatory tools heading into the last month before finals.

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