The Hurricane Diaries

Shon and Ryan —funny giraffes!

Having won the Yale College Council’s Last Comic Standing competition the Friday before fall break, Ryan Bowers ’14 and Shon Arieh-Lerer ’14 will be opening for guest comedian John Mulaney at the Fall Show this Saturday. Taking time out from his schedule in the run-up to the Show, Bowers wrote a WEEKEND View about his Hurricane Sandy experiences. Looks like it was pretty real.

6:30 p.m.: Here we go, Sandy! Irene caught me off guard last year, but this time, I’m prepared. I went to Stop and Shop to pick up some of my favorite snacks (Smartfood, green apples and a whole pack of chewy Chips Ahoy), and I can’t wait to spend this whole hurricane with my girlfriend! It’ll be like one big sleepover! I can’t wait!

7:30.p.m.: Boy, this curfew sure started early! It’s only 7:30 p.m., and I’m already done with all the work I needed to do. Oh well! I guess this just means more time to hang out and have fun with my girlfriend!

8:30 p.m.: I just went to eat some of my chewy Chips Ahoy cookies, and it turns out my girlfriend ate all of them. It’s no big deal, though. She said she’s gonna go get me some more.

9:00 p.m.: It’s too windy to go outside, so it looks there won’t be any chewy Chips Ahoy for Ryan! Hahaha! Just my luck! We’re about to watch some classic Office episodes, though, so it’s all good!

9:12 p.m.: I can’t focus on “The Office.” All I can think about are the cookies. They would have been so soft and delicious.

9:19 p.m.: I wonder if any stores are still open. I’ll go outside to check.

9:22 p.m.: Loose tree branch. Head bleeding. Must get chewy Chips Ahoy.

9:45 p.m.: Thought I saw a box of chewy Chips Ahoy across the room. I started eating it only to find it was a couch pillow. Finished it anyway.

10:27 p.m.: Girlfriend keeps saying I should calm down. What does she know? She has a belly full of delicious chewy Chips Ahoy cookies. I’ll calm down when I have tasted their tender saccharine goodness.

11:03 p.m.: WHY HAVE I BEEN CHOSEN FOR THIS? WHY, GOD?

11:58 p.m.: If I don’t get some chewy Chips Ahoy cookies soon, I will literally eat my own foot.

12:04 a.m.: I am not that flexible.

12:13 a.m.: So sleepy. Must keep obsessively chronicling …

10:05 a.m.: The storm has passed. I can finally get my cookies! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA!

11:15 a.m.: These tasted better when I was a kid.

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