Blonde: Job recruitment spurs September stress

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As a senior at Yale, just being awake is stressful. The simple pleasures that I used to derive from the little things like walking down the street with my iPod, checking my email, even eating dinner with friends, have all been tarnished by the same thing: job recruitment.

While admittedly much of the stress is self-imposed, a lot of it comes from 1,300 of my closest friends, all of whom seem to be more qualified and better at wearing a suit than I do right now.

Why am I even wearing a suit right now? It’s September. This lining is killing me. Is anyone else having a Ross-in-the-leather-pants moment?

The actual process of applying for a job is difficult enough and isn’t made easier by the fact that I’m in this rat race with mah people.

Observation: A classmate, wearing a suit, particularly around the area of Grove and Whitney.

Reaction: I wonder where she/he is headed. Oh, UCS probably. Cool. I wonder what that’s for. I thought that interviews didn’t start until October. Maybe it’s a mock interview? Or maybe this is the job equivalent of likely letters? What are you doing and why wasn’t I invited? I’m not even doing consulting but this still matters so much.

Observation: A classmate posting a status on Facebook about interview/job.

Reaction: Why are we friends?

Observation: The UCS Appointment Calendar.

Reaction: No future appointments available, no future appointments available, ah so busy … Oh hey, Halloween. I should go as a dinosaur this year. Will people get it? And I have that Snow White costume I wanted to wear. What day is Halloween even on this year? A Monday? Wait — what was I doing?

Observation: Recruiters at the career fair in between conversations with students.

Reaction: They seem really happy. They probably loved that girl that just left and are probably all “I like them I like them I liked them first before I even met them I liked them I told them I liked them right away you hate them compared to how much I like them” all lemur-from-Madagascar-like. They probably forgot about me. I wonder if Capital One still has any of those Under Armour shirts left …

Observation: The J.Crew “Wear to Work” Event.

Reaction: Shopping — this I can do. Minimum of $250 for the discount? That’s a big investment in interview clothing for currently hypothetical interviews!

Observation: People discussing jobs.

Reaction: Stop. Just stop.

Observation: Someone with a job offer.

Reaction: Bitch.

Observation: Anything listed above, the UCS website, e-recruiting, fancy leather folders.

Reaction: Food.

Clarification: These silly jabs are by no means intended to criticize my fellow seniors who are wading through the job market waters. We are a society of friends, after all. This is just me, casting my mask of indifferent confidence aside, admitting that this process stresses me out, and that sometimes I wish I was still a sophomore who didn’t even know what consulting or I-banking was. (I’m still not sure I know what either of those mean.)

In any CASE (GET IT, GET IT?), we’ll make it through.

Only four months till Feb Club, anyway.

Good luck, team.

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