Glitter

why?

Not the Mariah Carey sludgebomb but the tiny iridescent aluminum flecks of joy. Throw it into faces.

Dating service: How about we …

why?

Never have a bad date again. Meet matches by suggesting your ideal date. The possibilities are endless.

Making this book

why?

Because you’ll thank us afterward. Make a poster!

The Island of the Dead

warum?

Freud, Lenin and Clemenceau owned prints of this Symbolist painting by Arnold Böcklin. Does death = greatness?

Murray Biggs

why?

“WAR IN FIVE VOICES” a reading tonight! JE Theater, 5:15

Fredric Jameson

why?

It’s easier to imagine the end of the world than the end of capitalism. Plus, when this Marxist theorist of periodisation steps int to the club, the club goes wild.

Hale Bopp

why?

Don’t mistake this fiery rocket for Halley’s Comet, its mere shadow (but Mark Twain’s favorite comet). No, the brightest and most widely-viewed ever, Hale Bop made the rounds in 1997 and even inspired a mass suicide! Watch out in 4385.

Leonard Cohen

why?

Canadian cassanova, poet-hearthrob-hallelujah.

Wild Alaskan salmon

why?

It’s loaded with essential fatty acids and tastes divine. But, don’t buy the farm-raised stuff, it’s just loaded with hormones.

Volume concert tonight

why?

Ezra Stiles Dining Hall — Picture Plane & Teengirl Fantasy — 10 p.m. — IF YOU LOVE MUSIC, BE THERE

Transubstantiation

why?

Drinking blood is in.

Being on time

why?

It’s better than being late. Well, sometimes.