Reasons Why You’re Fat: SUPER BOWL EDITION

Dinner last night was ABSURD. I probably ate upwards of 2000 calories in one sitting, and it was somewhat glorious. What began as a burger and fries quickly became a burger, fries, another burger, more fries, popcorn, coke, a hot dog, and peas. I left the dining hall bloated and blissful, relishing in what was one of the most satisfying meals we have had this year.

That’s the beautiful thing about the Super Bowl: it’s one of the few days of the year (along with Fourth of July, Labor Day, Thanksgiving obv, Christmas/Hannukah, etc) in which we have complete license to indulge our stomachs and consume without end. Calories don’t count on Super Bowl Sunday; there’s no such thing as weight or health, and all that matters is embracing Americana and being bros.

Also, I hope everyone saw the INCREDIBLE Coca-Cola commercial featuring the Simpsons.

As an avid Coke fan, I actually got a lil’ sentimental at the end when the problems of Mr. Burns 1914 are solved by Coke. That feeling hits close to home for me–at the end of many a long day, I turned not to the bottle but instead to Coke to drown my problems. So thanks, Coke. I love you.

Comments

  • ugh

    this was a waste of bandwith.