Top 10 Ways to Procrastinate During Exams

  1. Virtual Communication: Arrange Skype dates with all of your high school friends, middle school friends, elementary school friends, summer friends, friends of friends — even daycare friends! (You just need to find them on Facebook first….) If you get through this list, start Skyping with your friends at Yale! Or if Skype’s too much effort, just go on Gchat. It’s what all the cool kids do.

  2. Bake ­— Crownies: The next best thing to eating is making food — many say it’s therapeutic, a perfect way to relax while generating nibbling material for later. Apparently ‘crownies’ are all the rage in Saybrook right now. If you couldn’t figure it out, that’s a cross between a cookie and a brownie.

  3. Protest Something: See someone always protesting something on Cross Campus? Why can’t that be you! Grab a few equally unproductive friends and brainstorm something you think is an abhorrent injustice in your life. Justin Bieber’s “autobiography”? Bacon in the French toast muffins? The existence of exams themselves? The options are limitless.

  4. YALE Up Your Life: Feel like everyone has way more Yale paraphernalia than you do? Easy fix! Hundreds of Yale-branded items are sitting forlornly, awaiting a Yalie to claim them…at the bookstore, Campus Customs, even Walgreens! This is the chance to make sure that everything you use, from highlighter to shot glass to shoulder bag, makes everyone aware that you go to YALE.

  5. Clean and Rearrange: Your common room is looking pretty grubby. Assemble your suitemates, designate cleaning responsibilities, and spend the afternoon blasting a playlist (which obviously you create just for the occasion) and making your living quarters spic and span. After all, you can’t study if your study space is a mess, right?

  6. Clean Out Your Inbox: You’ve been meaning to all term, and now that 99% of your inbox is totally irrelevant, you can go through and delete all of it — but make sure you still allot plenty of time to save anything sentimental. Or, if you’re a packrat and can’t delete anything, create topic folders and organize everything accordingly.

  7. Start a Nonprofit or Launch a Business: Haven’t you ever wanted to? Now’s the time! Begin planning your ground-breaking business initiative (like “Sleep-in-a-Pill” or Speed Golf, to name a few ideas), or bring that nonprofit you’ve been mulling over into reality.

  8. Start a Website: It’s so easy, why not? Buy a URL — it’s only about $10 a year, depending on whether you choose to be .com, .net, or .biz — and create something cool, or better yet, controversial. Just check out domain.com and take it from there.

  9. Explore the Stacks: Slip out of the dreariness of Bass and into Sterling’s Stacks. Get lost and spend a few hours trying to find your way out. Maybe you’ll run into another disoriented, procrastinating, extremely attractive individual….

  10. Make Lists — Lots and Lots of Them: Make lists of everything you need to do (but never will). Then, to make yourself feel better, make a list of all of the things you’ve already accomplished over the day (wake up, eat, make a list) so that you can check them off and get that great feeling of productivity. Then make a holiday wish list to send your parents. Then make a Yale bucket list. Then make a list of ways to procrastinate.

Comments