November 22nd, 2013 | Cross Campus

Joke ticket wins race in Harvard UC elections

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The winners in matching golden American Apparel hoodies. Photo provided by Sam Clark and Gus Mayopoulos.

Update Friday, November 22, 1:11 am: Today marks the death of student government, or perhaps its rebirth. Clark and Mayopoulos won with more than 1375 votes out of 3,181 votes cast, according to the Harvard Crimson. They have since announced intentions to resign, although readers have taken to the Crimson’s comment section to entreat them to stay in office. Hey, no need to resign until a Watergate scandal (or cheating scandal) breaks.

“We technically can’t yet, but as soon as we can, we hereby resign the offices of President and Vice-President of the Harvard Undergraduate Council,” Clark and Mayopoulos said in a statement to the Crimson. “LONG LIVE DEAN EVELYNN HAMMONDS.”

The other two tickets in the race were C.C. Gong ’15 with Sietse K. Goffard ’15 and Chika-Dike O. Nwokike ’15 with Una Kim ’15.

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Originally published Thursday, November 21: Juniors Sam Clark and Gus Mayopoulos are running one helluva race for UC President and Vice-President, respectively, in the Harvard Undergraduate Council elections. Designated the “joke ticket” by The Harvard Crimson, their campaign is centered on the promised of tomato basil ravioli soup served daily in the dining halls, thicker toilet paper for all, and “divesting from gender neutral weekend shuttles.” “You Could Do Worse,” the campaign slogan reads. Neither candidate has UC experience, which they describe as an asset. With YCC elections a tad less entertaining this time of year, XC reached out to the two politicians to discuss their personal and political stances.

Q: If you guys were to get regular meetings with Drew Faust for a year, how would you guys spend all that time?

A: Civil War talk over Tomato Basil Ravioli Soup.

Q: Boxers or briefs?

A: Why not both? There’s safety in numbers, especially with that crazy shitter running around your campus.

Q: If you were to compare yourselves to major political figures from history, who would you each choose, respectively?

Sam: Abraham Lincoln. Gus: Vice Abraham Lincoln.

Q: What do you plan to do about Harvard’s $34 million budget deficit?

A: The what?

Q: How would you sum up your two competing tickets in 3 words or less?

A: Four competitors.

Q: Why do you think you did not receive The Crimson’s endorsement?

A: Why didn’t YOU receive the Crimson’s endorsement?

Q: If elected, how do you plan to connect with the student body?

A: Fax.

Q: What do you think will be the lasting legacy of your campaign?

A: Our bastard son. Reynold.

The Harvard Undergraduate Council elections end today. Meanwhile, the Pundits are encouraged to begin planning for the Yale College Council elections this spring.