Author Archives: Helen Vera

As much as I hate to admit it, and as earnestly I have sought evidence to the contrary, rules of etiquette have become anachronistic. Etiquette is dead. There are no rules. Gone are the days when housewives in shirtwaists and heels marked a page in the family volume of Emily Post to instruct their daughters »

When I first heard about the Tangled Up In Blue “Contra Dance,” I was confused. What was this argumentative-sounding affair? Was it somehow contradictory? Did it attract contrary types? Counter-revolutionaries? The event, which happened last Friday, March 24, turned out to be a social dance of the country and western variety, a benevolent invasion of »

Last semester, Yale University Dining Services conducted a survey to assess dining quality. Last month, the Yale Sustainable Food Project collected signatures in favor of the Project’s expansion. Students in residential colleges besides Berkeley constantly grumble about the food on their plates. Let’s face it: We don’t like the food we get in dining halls. »

The illustrations in “Sex Week at Yale: The Magazine” feature no fewer than 20 women wearing underwear, lingerie or less. One of these women is the cover girl, naked but for Yale panties and hoop earrings. Four are playboy bunnies — one sitting in the palm of a giant male hand — two are Yale »

Here are some things that Yale students get away with saying about other universities: “I think that having a Quinnipiac-themed party is a good idea, because then all the girls will come dressed like sluts”; “Quinnipiac is good for one thing: the hot people who come to Toad’s”; “That building looks like something at a »

A few nights ago, as I fumbled for my keys outside my entryway door, a receipt fluttered from my bag onto the wet path. I didn’t want to pick it up. I was cold, my clothing had been thinned and chilled by the wind and my fingers were numb. I didn’t feel like bending down »

In recent weeks, a startling abundance of paper, in the form of little sheets, has made its way into my living space. Despite the incredible ease and convenience of electronic communication — through which almost everybody can be reached instantly and directly — the preferred means of mass communication seem to have regressed to sheets »

Once upon a fairly recent time, the prevalence of cellular phones annoyed and offended me. I shuddered to see people taking calls in the library, leaving phones on during class and chatting as they walked down the street, ignoring the real world around them and retreating to a different, far-away land, a land of beeps »

Nobody seems to like Supreme Court nominee Harriet Miers, and for mostly the wrong reasons. Initially, prominent Republicans worried that Miers was not conservative enough, that there was too much mystery surrounding her personal beliefs on issues — namely abortion — that might appear before the court. Conservative activist James Dobson assured partisans that Miers »

Growing up, we’re taught that gossip is cruel and that secrets are no fun. Talking about people behind their backs is rude and hurtful. It is catty, shallow. It’s bad. And all of this is true, right? We owe it to each other and ourselves to be honest and forthcoming, right? Wrong. Juicy secrets and »

Writing an etiquette column isn’t the only thing that I do with my time; I also serve tea in my college library one night each week. That’s right, I’m one of two library managers, and I take my job seriously. The students of Jonathan Edwards College — some of them, anyway — depend on me »

Unlike Victorian ladies, who were supposed to be charming, and unlike feminists of a few decades ago, who were supposed to be powerful, girls today are supposed to have it all. Just look around and you’ll see that the Super Girls of our generation are pretty, healthy, charming, smart, savvy and powerful. Hell, they’re pretty »