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COMMUNITY HEALTH EDUCATORS INFORMATION SESSION

DWIGHT HALL LIBRARY // 8:00 AM

Come watch the Community Health Educators display their skills, namely putting a condom on a wooden penis and scaring the pants back onto kids who might otherwise contract STIs.

YALE HEAVYWEIGHT CREW INFORMATIONAL MEETING

ROWING TANK B, BASEMENT OF PAYNE WHITNEY GYM // 1:00 PM

Are you tall, slightly athletic and in awe of the crew team after its Saturday night party? Why not walk on to the team, act like your really into it for a while and then quit, realizing that you can’t handle the hours spent behind a rowing machine, floating on cold waters and caressing faces with calloused hands.

WHO GETS STRESSED? (NOT ME!) STRESS AND THE YALE COLLEGE STUDENT

SSS ROOM 114 // 2:00 PM

Judson Brewer, MD, PHD tells you how to identify stressors and resist their ulcer- and hemorrhoid-causing charm. Expect the doctor to give you great tips on reconnecting with your love affair with prescription pills, long-distance running and masturbation. Don’t let the event’s title stress you out.

CAMP YALE: SNACKS AND SMORES

WOMEN’S CENTER // 10:30 PM

Learn about LGBTQI living at Yale with smores, cookies, gummies, popcorn and milk! YUMMY!

THE CUCUMBER STAND-UP OPEN MIC NIGHT

THE CALHOUN CABARET // 11:00 PM

This is the open mic night of the Yale Record (the humor magazine). You’ve heard of humor? You’ve heard of stand up? Watch or participate. Be brave.